In our lives, we are taught to be a certain way, raised up a certain way in terms of academics, social expectations, career choices, behaviours and certain timelines for everything . Some people, not knowing any other way, fit into this mold, while others look at them and think, “maybe I should be more like them.” But the reality is, that’s not how it should be.

Think about children. Parents raise them a certain way, teachers guide them, and maybe the other kids around them follow similar paths. Children are carefree; they don’t yet know all the things the world will later try to impose on them and maybe that’s a good thing. As we grow older, though, we begin to experience changes, the part that many people don’t like. Reality is that, these changes are our chances to realize our true identity. But this often gets twisted when we try to fit into others’ expectations instead of realising our own strengths.

Teenagers, especially, often find themselves in a dilemma—trying to figure out what’s right or wrong, what they should or shouldn’t do. Some try hard to fit in, exhausting themselves trying to meet unrealistic ideals. But why? Why do we feel the need to seek others’ approval to survive? What are we trying to prove? The reality is, we don’t have to prove anything to be worthy.

Societal standards and expectations are one thing, but let’s talk about peer pressure for a moment. In schools, we often see a bunch of people trying to act “cool” or “normal” to fit in. Maybe we don’t fit into their mental, emotional, or physical standards. We might like things they find boring or weird, and that causes us to question ourselves. But the truth is: we don’t need to be like them. After school, most of these people won’t even be a part of our lives. So why are we trying to please them or follow their trends? Its okay to say no to things that don’t align with who we are. Just because we don’t fit into their mold doesn’t mean we’re unwanted. There are plenty of people who will accept us for who we are, who will see the beauty in being ourselves when we stop trying to be someone else.

This creates an internal conflict: the person we want to become vs the person we think we need to be to belong. But it’s our experiences that shape who we are, and only we define our lives. The goal isn’t to fit in but to be unapologetically ourselves. That’s what makes us stand out.

I remember once, during my viva, my teacher asked me to describe myself in just one word. At first, my mind raced through a million options unable to fixate on one, wondering what she would want to hear. But then I realized something. I wasn’t here to tell her what she wanted to hear. I needed to be honest with myself. So, I took a breath and just said, “authentic.” Her response was a smile, she agreed. It was a moment of realisation that we often spend so much time trying to fit into what others want us to be, that we forget to embrace the person we truly are.

We weren’t born to fit in. We were born to stand out. The world doesn’t need more copies,it needs originals. So why not be ourselves in a world filled with everyone else?