Sometimes people just say one unpleasant line and leave, doesn’t it happen? They just say one line. Have you wondered how many such negative phrases and words we say to ourselves after that? Upon hearing the negative comments, we feel so heavy with it all that we will want to share it with someone else to feel better. So we narrate everything to someone else and after saying several negative lines, after saddening the mind in the end we say, ‘’they hurt me’’. In reality they had only said one or two lines to make us feel sad, to discourage us, to make us feel inferior. And most of the time we actually do. Nobody can affect our state of mind at all. Nobody can hurt us. The only person who can hurt you is YOU.

How people talk to you is their choice. After listening to them, how we talk to ourselves is OUR choice. They can get disturbed themselves. But no one and by no one I mean not a single person can change your state of mind.

Try finding happiness in small things even if you are facing problems or sad about something. If someone is rude or mean to you about something, try taking it positively.

Kabir das once said: “Nindak niyare rakhiye aangan kuti chhawaye; Bin sabun pani bina nirmal karat subhaye.”

He who condemns, insults us because of our drawbacks should be kept closer to ourselves. He cleans our nature by revealing our mistakes without soap and water.

Similarly, if we take the negative comments in a positive way maybe then we can bring ourselves up to their expectations and give them no chance to do it again.

Now a days it has become a kind of a trend to not talk to the person you had a conflict with for some time. How many of you have the same practice? Well I had it. It seemed like a very normal and obvious thing to do after a disagreement. But then one day, my grandma told me that we can implement an alternative way of solving a dispute. She told me, ‘’Right after the quarrel, we can normalize everything between us and the other person.’’ I pondered over it for a minute. It was difficult but possible.

I tried this when I had a dispute and it actually worked. The person bore a mixed feeling of shock, shame and regret on her face. I too was quite amazed of how this small trick worked. I had chosen peace over ego.

Many a times ego takes a higher priority than our will for peace. We should not let ego overpower it. Why don’t we bend our egos a little bit for people we quarrel with? Let’s create a new trend together. The argument is over we have said everything that had to be told to each other, now let’s become normal. Try finding happiness in it. Don’t think that you will become inferior to them if you don’t talk back. Think that you have become better than them because you have the ability to do what they can’t- forgive others.

Let’s make a change from now on. Let’s not grumble over about our life and be happy with whatever we have.

Happiness and fulfilment are within your grasp, but sometimes just out of reach. Understanding what works best for you is the first step in finding them more often.

Work for your and other’s happiness rather than conflicts. We have no advantage in making enemies, but making friends has many. Try using the same trick and where you were to find regret and anger, you will find happiness. You being happy is all that matters.