It all comes back. It may take years or decades, but life has this tendency to complete full circles and bring us back to where we once were…

There were times when we felt restrained while living in small towns and villages. We fled to cities in large numbers, and basked for decades in the glitter and glamour of bustling cities. Now, we feel tired of the ceaseless noise and intense pace. We once again yearn for solitude. We dream of owning ‘country-side’ homes or small cottages in small quiet places. For vacations too, we search for quaint and quiet getaways, just as we earlier used to search for ‘happening’ and bustling tourist attractions.

We frowned at farm work, and desperately attempted joining the bandwagon of white-collared workers. Today, many of us wish to retire early, own a small patch of land somewhere and take up farming, leaving behind the travails of getting sucked up by the corporate world.

We felt hindered; felt gagged in the presence of a large joint family and dreamt of a nuclear set-up. We wanted to be ‘free’; to be able to go anywhere at odd hours; to have celebrations without being interrogated; to lead life as we pleased, with no one to be accountable to. Today, when we feel the pressures of bringing up even one child, and the loneliness that begins tugging the heart as kids start growing up—it makes us want our parents to be there… Their physical presence and their emotional support makes a big difference, we now realise…

We were born alone, but we knitted a web of relationships around us… When a few didn’t content us, we began clamouring for more and more… We wanted to ‘feel better’ and ‘boast better’ that we have dozens and dozens of friends. We began digging up for long-lost friends and relatives and began sharing pics and forwarded ‘gyaan’, there being not much other innate stuff to share. Today, the cycle is moving full circle. Many are exiting FB and group chats; have begun to realise that friends-can be just one or two and quite adequate this number can be.

Life does move in cyclical patterns. From a sense of boredom for the ‘ghar ka khaana’, and a zestful appetite for junk food, we have moved a full circle herein too. We have become conscious of healthy eating once again; we are realising the damaging consequences of eating out consistently, and hence, it is back to green leafy vegetables, organic stuff and oil without trans-fats. From super-burgers and jumbo colas, the tide is turning towards soups and salads.

The million-dollar question here is that to what extremes do we stretch ourselves, and how long do we take to move back once again? It could prove to be a bit late, at times. Would it not make sense to take a pause every once-in-a-while and check whether we have been swinging at either end of the extremes and for how long?

There was an entire generation which, their parents felt, was wasting too much time hanging out with friends. The young and restless minds debated on endless topics, over endless cups of tea in the college canteens and frittered away precious hours. Today, there is an entire generation which, their parents feel, is spending in solitude –with the heads bent low over gadgets. They do not greet the family members or the guests; they chat for hours with their friends without as much as uttering a single word and have no time for debates or discussions. We may move back, to the times when ‘real’ friends will replace our virtual friends and emotional debates will replace the cold chats over gadgets. However, what if it is too late?

With fashion and food, we can afford any pace for the cycle to complete a full circle. However, while juggling between two extremes of hectic socialising, and yearning to be just left alone at all times—it is better to realise before the repercussions hit us. A comfort level, somewhere in between, will suit us better, isn’t it? When the health of the mind and the body is at stake, a balanced state will not unnerve us—even as the cycle keeps moving.

There was a time, when parents were unflinchingly revered and worshipped and all their decisions accepted without as much as a blink. And then, we moved to another extreme—wherein we felt that to rebel against the diktats of the parents was the ‘in-thing’. We didn’t want the interference; the constant spree of advices and we waited to simply ‘break free’ and not look back at the wrinkled and tear-filled eyes. Today, double-income-one-kid families are juggling with their own wants and limitations. Parents are ‘needed’ by young couples at many critical times… Will this need, however, confine itself to baby-sitting for their kid? Or, is there a deeper realisation that three generations can co-exist and build happy homes. Where shall this cycle head to? We must think over…

‘Women do not need to work’, was an underlying principle in many a families in the 70s and 80s. Then, the tide turned and women began to step out, assuming multiple responsibilities at many fronts. It wasn’t easy and many had to pay a price for this liberation. Many of them, though, managed brilliantly at every front and a long trail of credible achievements in our social set-up can be seen. The cycle has, nevertheless, begun moving… There are many educated women who, if there are no financial compulsions, choose to stay at home. Here, there is a need to pause and think… If this option of staying at home is not sensibly exercised--boredom, frustration and frivolous activities will set in and once again, make us yearn for the extreme at the other end… In no situation then, will we be able to live contented.

There was a time, when the young Indian desperately sought a job in a ‘foreign’ country... We borrowed money; gathered whatever resources we could and paid extensive amounts to the touts, in order to step out of the country. The cycle is moving a full circle... Our economy is ‘looking up’; the greener pastures could soon be those which we have left and come... Who knows, we shall soon gather our resources and gear ourselves up to step back into our country forever...

Meanwhile, let us look inward and observe where we stand as several cycles keep moving...